“He’s home! He’s home! He’s home!” My favorite part of each day takes place between 6:30 to 7:00 PM every night. That is when the garage door goes up, the car pulls in, and I walk in the door arriving home from a hard but productive day at work. It has become our family tradition that when I arrive, my wife and daughter shout those six wonderful words in unison. There are then hugs and kisses and a general mini-celebration. I love my job but I also love coming home!
Hollywood experts tell us the initial scene of any movie is critical. The opening scene creates conflict. Man against man; Man against nature; or Man against himself. The opening act sets the stage for the rest of the movie. When a man arrives home, how he is welcomed sets the stage for the rest of the evening.
The following is what I experience and feel because of how my wife and daughter welcome me home every evening:
- Confidence - The level of a man’s performance is in direct proportion to his wife’s confidence in him. They make me feel so valued and important that I feel I can accomplish almost anything.
- Encouragement – Whatever redeemable qualities I have as a husband and father are reinforced and their attitude compels me to build on those qualities and be the best leader that I possibly can.
- Perspective – This life is joyful but it’s also hard. There are days we all have that we’re simply glad when they’re over. When those days occur, their loving attitude allows proper balance and perspective to return.
- Positive Attitude - Many times at night, there are issues we have to deal with. Whether it’s a phone call received earlier in the day, unwelcome mail, or the challenges of doing homework with my daughter who would rather watch Hannah Montana, I am now able to address those items with a more positive attitude.
- Increased Generosity - There is nothing I wouldn’t do for my family. Their response to my efforts simply makes me want to serve them more and give them everything I can. Their response to my leadership moves me from my natural default mode of greed to one of generosity.
I know what many women may be thinking right now. This post is unrealistic because they are not shouting “He’s home” when their husband arrives. They do not view their husband as the man in the picture above. Here’s my advice, don’t let someone else’s performance or character determines your’s.
Men are naturally insecure. That’s a big secret about men but it’s true. Men want to be heroes but are deathly afraid of failure, not measuring up, and not providing. This is in our DNA from Adam and the Garden. Treat him like the knight in shining armor he desperately wants to be and I guarantee that many times he will then become one.
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